Dear me,

I know this may seem impossible to believe, but you are dearly loved and treasured by God. He chose you as His very own.

I want to share with you that Jesus is very real. You have a heavenly Father who sees you, a Savior who saves you, and a Holy Spirit that never abandons you. God will rescue you. You are safe in His care.

I wish I could tell you the journey will be easy, but it won’t. Please hear me- you never quit. You learn that His strength is yours.

You learn.

You lose…a lot.

You hurt.

You get hurt.

You will never be able to imagine what you’ll walk through. Remember what I said, you- me…we don’t give up. The Jesus you have no idea about right now will find you. He has known you forever.

We may never know why, but despair and sorrow is what’s ahead for us. I know this sounds scary, but I promise you learn what refining fire is. You will learn, hands on, what real faith is. What endurance, perseverance, and steadfastness is.

I want to tell you what not to do to save you from so many bad choices. I want to tell you what doesn’t work. But, it’s from the destructive behaviors that you gain a knowing you need, and an understanding of what patterns must be broken. I wish there was another way.

You will be hurt and you’ll hurt others. There are some choices you’ll make that will cause a root of shame and regret to sprout. A critical spirit and bitterness will make their home in you. The good news is you become very aware and work at changing it. It doesn’t happen as fast as you want, but it does come. You will realize you need to surrender it to the Lord. He is the only One who can dig those out.

You will have idols that He demolishes. Gratitude will deepen from that. The definitions you have now for many words will completely change. Thankfulness is one of them!

Our life will be so out of control that you’ll try to control whatever you can to feel safe. You will learn that you can only control you and your choices.

This may all sound hopeless and you’ll feel hopeless, but you will discover what true hope is. Hope is a person and His name is Jesus. Hope becomes one of your favorite words.

Anchor into the God of protection and refuge as I tell you the rest. Just say those words out loud- He will hear you.

You will experience abuse, addiction, betrayal, neglect, abandonment, deceit, unforgiveness, not having a voice, being misportrayed, rejection, and loss. So much loss.

You will lose friendships…and gain them. You will lose grandparents that loved you and taught you so much…and tuck that in close for comfort. You will only hear a heartbeat of one of your babies…and you’ll be blessed with more. I’ll let the genders be a surprise.

You will have a season of time that you’ll treasure with them- your flaws and all. Then, you’ll lose pieces of your heart as you go through tragedy, death, estrangement, and distancing. As of today’s date you will have grandchildren you love dearly and sadly some of them you’ve never met.

Mother’s Day will go from homemade cards and breakfasts to a day that brings a fresh cup of sadness. The memories of what was will try to steal your joy. But, you will have already learned joy is Jesus only You.

You will lose your marriage…and get it back again. You will finally be given tools that work. Wait and it will come!

You will lose your health and work hard at getting it back. You will learn so much about how to be your best health advocate. Guess what? You will say goodbye to doritos and pepsi!

The Lord will redeem and restore so very much. It will look different than the fairy tale tv family you dreamed about. You’ll learn those are actors and not real families.

He will place you in organizations and ministries where you’ll meet some amazing people. He will bring those who see you for you and not your past.

One day you’ll become vulnerable, take your testimony and all you’ve been through and use that to help others.

You’ll hunger and thirst for His Word in a life saving way. You will grow closer and closer to your Healer. Trauma therapy will come and you’ll go with Jesus to those deep buried places and watch as He places His healing touch on areas you thought would never be.

I won’t lie to you, there isn’t one step ahead that will be easy. There will be times you can barely stand and He will carry you. He will wipe every tear and love you through every wound. He will reach down and pull you up out of the pit.

Your heart will shatter into a million pieces. You will scramble to pick them up only to have them fall through your fingers. You will cry from the depths of your very soul. You will have soul wounds. Take courage- His wounds will shadow over yours and bring relief you never knew existed.

You will live a life polar opposite of your plans. You will watch dreams disappear.

You will learn what real safety is, and it’s value. You will discover your true identity as His adopted daughter. You will see what matters in life. You will stay steady in Jesus even at the risk of more loss.

The world doesn’t exactly become like the Jetson’s, it takes a much worse turn. The road to Revelation is another very real thing. The bible is real. You will discern what is real and what isn’t. Stay so very close to His Word. You’ll have favorite verses that fill you and minister to you.

You will absolutely love praise and worship music. Yes- you actually raise your hands. Right now you have no idea what that means, but you will!

You will lean into your Creator to get through each day. Oh the love He has for you. We will forever be a work in progress. There is still so much change to be had.

Today, the Friday before Mother’s Day 2023 ( I know- 2023…mind blowing, right?) you are facing a Mother’s Day solo for the first time. Please hear my heart, your heart….even in the sadness you still praise Him! Even in the grief you still love Him! Even in the disbelief you trust Him! Even more than you could ever imagine.

You know, without a doubt, that you are not really alone. The Holy Spirit is right here! You…myself…are standing on the promises and in His victory over the battles. Even if we never see the outcome- He wins.

You’ve already started praying for all the hurting people out there who struggle with this very same day. The ones who feel unseen, have a thousand unanswered questions, are aching so badly inside that they just don’t know which way to turn. The ones who cry in secret, hiding their pain and yet hoping someone will realize it’s there. So many people. So many tear stained pillows. You pray they feel His love and tender care.

Me, could you pause and pick some flowers for anyone you can think of. There just might be someone back there that is waiting to be noticed.

He loves you, He loves you, He loves you,

Love, me

2 thoughts on “Dear me,

  1. Amy

    Sister, you are stronger than you think. I have always seen and valued you – in all your stages of life. ❤️


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